rhodochrosite: (Default)
ash ([personal profile] rhodochrosite) wrote2026-01-14 03:10 pm

sincaraz hype moments and aura from changeover

highlight reel of quotes from changeover - giri nathan. this will not be my last post about this book.

JANNIK SINNER
Chapter 3: Boot and Rally
Mostly, though, he worked. Cvjetkovic remembered Sinner as a child with an unusual capacity for work, and an unusual gift for simplifying that work. A technical detail that might take others six months to learn, he would handle in a week.
//
Everyone noticed the same thing about Sinner’s tennis then as they do now: the sound produced when he makes contact with the ball. I have listened to it up close. Depending on his effort level and the acoustics of the court, it has sounded to me like a firearm, a vehicle backfiring, or a hydraulic press. I can understand why that talent scout thought Sinner was a construction site.
//
To track a fast-approaching sphere, intuit its trajectory, and start a swing at just the right moment to strike it cleanly—this is known as timing. Sinner has perfect timing the way a singer might have perfect pitch. The impact of strings on ball is devastating and pure.
//
Sinner came to Turin a sphere of heat and light, the home favorite, lustily cheered by Italian crowds.

Chapter 4: Dancing in the Pressure Storm
Standing on the court afterward, he said with a coy smile that he wouldn’t be disclosing his tactics, because he hoped to play his elder again and again. He was that rare young player who genuinely craved more encounters with Novak Djokovic, like a sheep that had developed a taste for wolf.
//
And yet here was Sinner, a sedate counterexample. A new, clearer picture of the Italian began to unfurl. Someone who came late to tennis, was never cornered into it, was at little risk of burnout compared to his peers, and instead maintained a gluttonous appetite for improvement. Even with the trophy sitting in front of his face, he was talking about next steps. “It’s a great moment for me and my team,” he said. “But in the other way, we also know that we have to improve if we want to have another chance to hold a big trophy again.” Tennis was no longer the sport for gentlemen who liked a cigarette during changeovers; it belonged to single-minded ascetics.
//
This evolved Sinner was one of the tour’s most balanced players, in every sense of that word: on both forehand and backhand, serve and return, defense and offense. And yet, according to a certain reductive but pervasive fan perspective, the scoreboard was clear: one major title versus two major titles. Get to work, kid.

Of course, nobody was more amenable to that imperative than Jannik himself.

Chapter 5: Smiling Through the Swarm
This should have ended the point. The ball was too far away from Sinner. But he ate up all that distance with hunched, loping strides, looking like a highly task-oriented antelope, and he did not merely put a racquet on the ball but somehow punched a proper backhand down-the-line, abruptly taking control of the point.

Chapter 9: Tossing Out the Syllabus
When I asked Berrettini what had changed most in Sinner since they had last played, since his vault to the top of the tour, he pointed to his softer touch with the racquet and his ability to “read the moments” in the match and detect when to deviate from the script. “I think he missed three balls in the whole match,” he said. “It didn’t give me that oxygen that sometimes you need.” Often Djokovic’s game was described with similarly stark images of oxygen deprivation. They both could suffocate an opponent by hitting ball after ball deep in the court.

Chapter 11: Damage Control
But in the second set, no matter how gingerly Sinner walked between points, once the ball was in play he was floating all over the court, smooth and wraithlike, whipping his racquet to a blur.
//
The art of winning a title like the Cincinnati Open was consistency, conserving energy on the good days, salvaging the bad days. Hazy serendipity had to be converted into a solid routine. The genius had to be repeatable.

That repeatability may be the central feature of Sinner’s tennis, and perhaps even of his spirit. In Cincinnati, as he’d acclimated himself to the surface, weather, tennis ball, and other particularities, he refined that capacity. Day by day he homed in on the pulse of the hard court itself, and once he’d locked into that beat, no one in the world could hang with his tennis. He made every moment uncannily like the last one, the next shot just as pure as the one last struck.

Chapter 12: Digestion and Indigestion
“But, no, I’m always quite relaxed. I’m someone who forgets quite fast something.” The gist: I don’t think about him at all.
//
Sinner’s best tennis feels both languid and violent; it can be difficult to connect the cause with the effect. In between shots his lank frame looks almost floppy, and as he skids and scrambles and makes his little adjustment steps around the court, you wonder if those feet will give out from underneath him. But right when the ball is approaching, all that ambient floppiness is aligned into one sublimely synchronized chain, from foot to hip to wrist, as he readies his full-body slingshot groundstrokes. A compact backswing, a snap, and the ball is gone. The visual is loose and jangly, but the sound is like someone hucking a billiard ball against a garage door. Real power in tennis comes from relaxation and timing, rather than pure muscular output. Sinner’s what you’d get if you made a whole tennis player out of that axiom.
//
Judging from that performance, it would be difficult to argue that anyone else on the planet was better at the simple, terrible task of placing a tennis ball heavy and deep into the opposing court, over and over.
//
Fritz had a chance to serve for the third set, but Sinner foreclosed on the comeback attempt. He moved through the endgame with a finality reminiscent of Djokovic, as if he’d done this a dozen times and would do it a dozen more.
//
After winning in straight sets, Sinner threw his hands in the air and left them there, in keeping with his low-impact style of celebration. Nothing frenzied, no loss of control—just a young man taking in the cold, clean air at the top of a mountain.

Chapter 13: Changeover
Not all players need that communal aspect. Jannik Sinner, for example, had a different orientation at a similarly tender age. His second skiing coach, Klaus Happacher, said that once Jannik really began to take the sport seriously, he requested that he leave his group lesson and train solo with the coach so he could better focus. Some people see more clearly where friendship and the pursuit of excellence diverge.


CARLOS ALCARAZ
Chapter 2: Cabeza, Corazón y Cojones
If you hadn’t paid attention all along, you might have been surprised to discover that the harbinger of tennis doom looked like such a cheerful adolescent doofus. But that was the feeling of early-career Carlos. So visibly happy to be there, so transparently living out a fantasy—a happiness that could infect any viewer, and a happiness that he channeled into his improvisational and blitzing style of tennis.
//
Imagine any discernible tennis skill. It doesn’t matter if you have the local jargon for it (“pace,” “footwork”) or just a general impression (“hits ball comically hard,” “runs around well”). You could look at Alcaraz and see that skill perfected.
//
Imagine the goalie on a foosball table, so explosive and responsive. Just that one little dude, gliding along a horizontal, ready to be spun at a furious pace with a light twist of a wrist. In his baseline exchanges Alcaraz stood on top of the line, never ceding more than an inch, waiting to meet the ball with lethal force, smooth in his movement but full of coiled rage. Then he reset instantly and did it again, melding caffeinated teen dynamism with a multi-major-winner’s point construction. There was a fluid, unrelenting quality to his play that I did not usually ascribe to animate objects, or anything that needs time to recover from physical exertion.
//
That’s the thing about Alcaraz—there are so many possible versions of him that in best-of-five, an opponent will eventually have to beat several. It was baffling how many distinct parts of tennis he had mastered, how they cohered into this figure of ruin. My initial mistake was trying to fit him into my general schema for understanding tennis players: as human beings whose technical and physical specs grant some gifts and take others off the table. Big servers tend to be too ungainly to return nimbly. The lightest and fastest players often lack punch. The slow-surface specialists panic when the ball bounces faster. But none of these trade-offs seemed to apply to Carlitos. He could simply have it all ways. This was why he evoked a sense of impossibility more than any other player in recent memory, because he combined so many traits that don’t belong together into a single psychedelic point.
//
That broad, sharky smile was a dark omen for the rest of the tour. If he was enjoying himself, his tennis was probably unplayable.

Chapter 4: Dancing in the Pressure Storm
This match epitomized the Alcaraz puzzle. His losses can look worse than the losses of other top players. He can be capable of stupefying ingenuity while playing against the best opponents, even in the most tense moments of a match. He can also, in more pedestrian moments, play squirrelly and confused tennis. He might get fixated on ideas that amuse him but do not win him points; he might start peacocking prematurely.

Chapter 5: Smiling Through the Swarm
It was Alcaraz’s dynamic range, his command of both delicacy and brutality, that drove opponents into hopeless guessing games. In one rally, as Zverev struck three consecutive kill shots he expected to end the rally, and Alcaraz pulled off three increasingly preposterous retrievals, the kid started smiling.
//
The point captured Alcaraz’s blend of sloppiness and imagination. He gets himself into a bind, then works his way out of it, via some diabolical logic that no other player could follow.

Chapter 6: Triage Ward
He spent the days leading up to the tournament on the practice courts, with his right forearm mummified in tape, bunting his forehands gingerly, an adverb that typically would not come within a mile of the tennis of Carlos Alcaraz.
//
Perhaps it was reasonable to wonder if his body would survive his own violent and beautiful playing style.

Chapter 7: Joy in Suffering
With Alcaraz, you get the sense that if there were no crowd, there would be no point to all this. His trade is tennis, but it is also spectacle. He never looks happier than when working a stadium into a froth of awe and glee. His tennis alone does most of the work for the fans, but he likes to embellish his genius with small gestures. A finger pointed up to his ear, beckoning the crowd to roar, while the ball he’s struck for a winner is still bouncing past his hapless opponent. A bright sharky smile, like a child who has committed a naughty deed but knows he can charm his way out of punishment. A silent raised fist. A cocksure nod. A single bellowed “vamos,” his mouth open wide enough to eat the tennis ball. A nonverbal howl, the carotid artery pulsing like a garden hose on the side of his neck. Or his favorite: eyes narrowed and teeth fully bared—not a grin, more like a big cat reminding you of its fangs.

None of this seems affected. It is all expressive and improvised, just like his play. Sinner has said that he admires this aspect of his rival, his ability to enrapture the masses. As I’ve noted, the Italian’s own forays into crowd work are humbler: a fist pump, a compact nod, an ashen gaze into the middle distance.
//
It isn’t incuriosity, just a case of tacit bodily wisdom winning over explicit analytical fact. To tear around the court and hit balls at the speed Alcaraz does seems to require an uncluttered mind. Getting wrapped up in the minutiae of equipment or injury could only lead to overthinking, to the gestation of doubts. Alcaraz knew as much as he needed to know and would not be weighed down by a grain of superfluous information. In that, he was like so many other intuitive high performers: It was better to feel than to know.
//
You have to find the joy in suffering,” said Alcaraz as he was interviewed on court minutes later. It was a perfect and subconscious homage to Rafa Nadal, who over his career spoke volumes about the masochism of tennis, his worldview still evidently looming over his tournament.
//
Harder to understand is how Alcaraz responds to pressure. For him, pressure seems clarifying. It forces him to stop temporizing. He stops surveying his various options on court and commits to the lucid, slashing style that made his name. It’s as if pressure snaps a lens into focus, revealing his own identity.
//
Alcaraz threw up the standard hand of apology, the usual etiquette when a player wins a point after his ball strikes the net cord—and then, when Zverev looked away, he cunningly curled his apology hand into a fist pump. No time for guilt. Some luck, sure, but also a glorious jolt of improvisation, the type of shot that explained why I’d overheard some French fans describe him as “pétillant”—sparkling, fizzy, like wine.
//
He concentrated his brilliance into a few critical doses and timed their delivery perfectly. That was enough. Carlos Alcaraz was capable of transcendence, but he was now also capable of winning a major title while far from transcendent, defeating many of his best contemporaries along the way.

Chapter 9: Tossing Out the Syllabus
Alcaraz is an alarmingly efficient mechanism for turning matches into useful muscle memory and actionable wisdom, I thought at the time.
//
But even then, as Alcaraz lifted the golden cup, he was just 46 hours and 15 minutes into his grass-court career. He was flying on sheer feel and animal instincts. True prodigy gets to skip the trial-and-error phase.
//
And then he came clean: “And I put in videos of myself last year. I’m not gonna lie,” he laughed. “To see what I did, and how I did it.” From him, it wasn’t arrogant, just sensible. Tennis’s most brilliant pupil had decided he didn’t need a syllabus anymore; he had become his own assigned reading.
//
He banged big first serves and followed them with unanswerable drop shots, condensing into two shots the force-finesse mix that was his stamp on the modern game.
//
He’d been watching videos of himself. Why go elsewhere for knowledge? Plato once theorized that people have immortal souls, full of knowledge accrued from past lives, so learning is actually just rediscovering that forgotten knowledge buried inside. Perhaps this has only ever been true of Carlos Alcaraz. How quickly we’d arrived at the juncture where there was so little for him to learn from other people’s examples, where he was writing the future of the sport by himself, expanding its possibilities with every half-volley and high-pressure triumph. He was eating at the big table already, and ravenously.

Chapter 10: Hoard of Gold
Alcaraz was the rare elite athlete who seemed to optimize his own pleasure at every moment on court. Sinner, too, spoke often about how treating tennis as a hobby was critical to his glacial cool in decisive moments, but the pleasure was less discernible on his face. With Alcaraz it was unmissable in that joyous, vacuous grin, making every passerby’s day. Here, as always, he looked adept at having fun.
//
To watch Carlitos pick up a new skill was one of tennis’s most reliable pleasures. Every coach he’d ever had was astonished by his capacity to integrate new information into his play.
//
“It’s going to be the best moment of my life, probably,” he said, referring to a high-pressure contest against a man who had spent the duration of Alcaraz’s conscious life siphoning his opponents’ joy with his tennis.
//
Carlitos learns so fast that it generates unintentional humor, best seen in his post-Wimbledon remarks. “I am totally different player than French Open. I grew up a lot since that moment,” he said, sincerely, about a match played five weeks before. He undergoes emotional and professional transformation in a span of time when most people his age might only fill a laundry hamper.

Chapter 11: Damage Control
But Carlitos is the consummate good boy. For an hour afterward I remained in shock, as if I’d witnessed some kind of natural disaster at a remove. My colleague Patrick Redford, watching at home, said it was like watching a puppy smoke a cigarette. With his four smashes, Alcaraz shattered an enduring image of professional happiness. As a kid, he’d had quite a temper, and while he’d managed it well enough to win four majors, perhaps he hadn’t exorcised it completely.

Chapter 12: Digestion and Indigestion
At an evening match, where the fans slurped down several of those under the bright stadium lights, the party ambiance intensified. It was an apt setting for Alcaraz, who was more or less a nightclub in the form of a tennis player.

Chapter 13: Changeover
He was the star pupil conjoined to the class clown.
//
Alcaraz had tried to sneak forward when there was no advantage to press—but instead of panicking, he simply created the advantage out of whole cloth, with an audacious volley from no-man’s-land. Then he kept creeping forward to the net. His talent overrode his error in judgment; the gambit paid off.
//
Here was another instance of him responding to scoreboard duress with his bravest tennis, living and dying by his reflexes and gut intuitions. Nobody was better when cornered.
//
He was a player for whom every single shot was physically possible, and when he lost, he tended to frame failure in emotional rather than physical terms. He might be a hunter always in search of a good feeling, capable of peerless play when he found it, but liable to sulk when he lost it.


SINCARAZ
Chapter 3: Boot and Rally
Sometimes it seems that the trick of playing Alcaraz is to strip him of opportunities to remember how original he is. Sinner, somehow recovered from his trials, managed to pin Alcaraz to the back of the court, as a butterfly to a corkboard. He used his power to deprive Alcaraz of his usual creative resources: wide angles, ample time on the ball, openings for a drop shot.

Chapter 5: Smiling Through the Swarm
Soon there were six points in a row that felt like a single hallucination, more vicious and vivid than the tennis we’d seen in the Big Three era. Alcaraz sprang a trap with a drop shot to lure Sinner in, hoping to hit a passing shot right by him, but Sinner, with his whole body still facing the back of the court, blocked a no-look volley into open space. I detected a new swagger in him—there he was, punishing another drop shot by slashing a slice hard crosscourt—as though Alcaraz were infecting him with his own way of life. Anyone who’d been watching tennis recently could tell they were doing something well beyond the usual patterns of the sport. They were inventing a new grammar all their own. Balls were struck hard at discombobulated elbow angles, immediate return winners were lashed off of big serves, sudden solutions were lobbed back at difficult questions. It was a matchup with no neutral shots, no peace talks. Attack or be attacked.
//
On court Alcaraz was asked about “how special a friend” Sinner is to him. “He means a lot to me,” he responded. “I always say that first thing is you have to be a good person, and athlete comes after that. And I think Jannik is the same.” The sun began to set over the mountains, in cotton-candy hues of pink and blue.
  • the cut to beautiful romantic sunset is insane work it's giving charamu reunion in mobile suit gundam zeta ep 14
Chapter 6: Triage Ward
Recall that, mere minutes after the Indian Wells win, the sweat still damp on Carlitos’s brow, an interviewer stood on court and asked him about “how much Jannik means to you.” The question wasn’t completely unprompted—they had hung out during the rain delay that interrupted the match—but the almost romantic intensity of the phrasing made me laugh out loud in the moment. Imagine that you are friends with a colleague, but firmly in the water-cooler-buddy tier of acquaintance. A couple of inside jokes, some shared workplace gripes to fill any lulls in conversation. But then imagine that you are periodically interviewed, for the entertainment of hundreds of thousands of fans, about how much that colleague means to you. I mean, he’s pretty nice, I guess?
  • rip my beloved sincoworkaraz dynamic 2019-2025
There’s a paradox in the friend-rival. On the one hand, it’s hard to be close with someone with whom you are locked in zero-sum competition for all the prizes you most lust after in your career; on the other hand, there is no one else in the world who knows the pressures and predicaments at the top of the game, no one else who could relate as easily to the contours of your strange life.

Chapter 7: Joy in Suffering
When Alcaraz plays badly, he can look uncentered and full of bad ideas. When Sinner plays badly, he looks like a machine just slightly miscalibrated, erring but with the right intent.
//
The tennis seemed to come out of nowhere. Writing about a match like this is attempting to impose a legible narrative on what is, effectively, two people trying to devise increasingly sophisticated ways of murdering one another for four hours. They were experiencing all kinds of small-scale spiritual and physical ups and downs, some of which would later make it into their comments after the match, and some of which will remain forever unknown, hard to articulate even for them, certainly in a second or third language. Often the real tennis match—its problem-solving, its private pains, its triage—resists after-the-fact comprehension.

Chapter 9: Tossing Out the Syllabus
At this stage of their careers, Alcaraz was more prone to burning out psychologically, and Sinner physically.

Chapter 10: Hoard of Gold
Old archetypes were often applied to new superstars, and in those formulations, Alcaraz was most often seen as the love child of Federer and Nadal, blending the former’s extempore all-court play with the latter’s brawn and vigor. Sinner, meanwhile, was the one seen as a power-injected, neo-Djokovic.

Chapter 11: Damage Control
Djokovic was still recovering from his Olympic bliss and would not play the role of the chaperone at the teen dance making room for the Holy Spirit between the youthful duo.
//
Some gifted but lesser players seemed to have this reaction to Alcaraz. He invited them into stimulating, inventive exchanges that reminded them of their own capabilities. Sinner, on the other hand, might just remind them of how far they were from the mountaintop.

Chapter 13: Changeover
Every time Sinner and Alcaraz saw an opportunity to attack, they seized it. Gone were the cagey, slow-burning rallies of Djokovic versus Nadal, each man hunting for a momentary lapse in stamina or focus. For the new kids, the game plan was to attack first, attack second. There was little taste for playing in a safe, error-reduction mode, the kind that Djokovic mastered in tiebreaks. Instead, Sinner said in an interview with Sky Sports that his tiebreak philosophy was to consider all the various attacks he’d tried over the course of the set and commit to those he felt had worked best. Sinner and Alcaraz were pioneering an era of “point-and-shoot” tennis, as Clarke put it, evoking the visual grammar of a first-person-shooter video game. If the ball was there to be hit, it would be hit—and hard.
//

Between these rivals, I could see each one mapping out the other’s tendencies, and then figuring out how to exploit the map the other had made. Specifically, in that second set, I came to appreciate a new wrinkle in the Alcaraz attack. He would rear back to hit a forehand, switch his grip as if to massage a drop shot—any savvy opponent would see that grip change and start shifting his weight to run forward—only to drive a slice deep through the court instead. He used this trick in two mesmerizing rallies, and each time it startled Sinner, perhaps the most balanced player I’ve ever seen. Both times he lost his footing and the point. With this mischief, Alcaraz had grafted another limb onto the decision tree in Sinner’s mind. The next time he moved his racquet that way, Sinner would remember what had happened before and wonder whether he should sprint ahead or stay put. To burden your opponent with additional uncertainty is to win the mind war.
//
The absolute best tennis induces laughter in audiences. This rivalry induced laughter even in the participants.
//
They both played true to their reputations. Sinner maintained a cruising altitude from start to finish, a level of tennis thousands of miles above most opponents, but not this one. Alcaraz’s level dipped and bobbed, but ultimately surpassed his rival’s in critical moments.
//
One was mercurial; the other methodical. One was a master of compartmentalization; the other seemed to feel everything all at once. Together they had made the sport anew.
//
Each has something the other lacks and would like to infuse into his own game. Alcaraz praises Sinner for his capacity to play every point at “9/10 or 10/10” intensity; the unspoken addendum is that he himself can fluctuate between 2/10 and 12/10. Sinner needs to find more comfort in the unscripted moments of feel and daring that are Alcaraz’s native habitat; there is more to tennis than the routine.
//
But the future will surely be defined by these two, interlocked in a joyful and absorbing struggle. They’ll get bigger and stronger; they’ll get smarter; they’ll get hurt; they’ll hurt each other. They could become genuine friends. They could drift apart.


BIG 3
Chapter 1: Empire
In the beginning, there was Roger Federer.
//
Perhaps the most poignant way to understand the Big Three was to see the optimism steadily squeezed out of their contemporaries, as if by a juicer, a cup filled to the brim with hopes and dreams.
//
Broadly speaking, these valiant victims of the Big Three moved through recognizable phases of career grief. First in this sequence was Persistence; all it would take was some dedicated training, some tactical adjustments, perhaps a few more twists of good fortune, and an important match may well swing his way in the future. After said match definitively did not swing in his favor, nor the one after, nor the one after that, the player might admit to Cluelessness. At this phase, they would have no particular intuition about what they could have done to win, and would feel altogether lost on the court. There could be bright flashes of Anger or Despair en route, but in time, the player arrived at Resignation. Perhaps this was the reality of playing tennis in this era, as stark and immovable as the face of a cliff, and there was nothing else to be done. At the end of this path was Enlightenment, a lovely ego death. To play a game for a living, to travel the world, to be alive at all, was a privilege—what’s that about a major?—no, he was content to sniff the freshly cut grass, kick the clay out of his shoes, and feel gratitude.
//
[Djokovic's] thinking was sophisticated in some ways and regressive in others, a prominent example of what might be termed “jock epistemology,” where elite athletes accumulate some useful beliefs for good reasons, some useful beliefs for bad reasons, and some bad beliefs for bad reasons.

Chapter 3: Boot and Rally
Then came the gatekeeper. It was an axiom in men’s tennis: If you do well enough in a meaningful tournament, there will come a time when you line up across the net from Novak Djokovic.

Chapter 4: Dancing in the Pressure Storm
When Djokovic is playing a best-of-five match, there’s often a luxurious lack of urgency to the affair. So what if he starts flat-footed? He is inevitability personified. He knows, as he gradually gets the blood pumping and the synovial fluids flowing, that he has a dozen higher gears of tennis at his disposal, and he’ll activate them as needed. He knows that his top gear can be matched by only a handful of people in the history of the sport. One of them was retired and probably eating fondue (Roger Federer), and another was busy rehabbing his hip (Rafael Nadal), and the youngest had just been upset the day before (Carlos Alcaraz).

Chapter 7: Joy in Suffering
And over the last two decades of the men’s tournament, one player has been its chief deity. Rafael Nadal has a higher success rate winning matches at Roland-Garros than I do at tying my own shoes. Heading into the 2024 tournament, he had won 112 of his 115 matches there. It is not merely one of the great feats in tennis, but one of the most consistent performances in any competitive human endeavor. Being that good at something must make it difficult to stop, as Nadal’s body now seemed to be urging him to do.
//
And yet Nadal has always played strange games with hope.
//
The old rites were all intact, even if the old tennis wasn’t.
//
On this court Nadal used to rigorously delete his opponents. A No. 1–ranked tennis player historically wins about 55 percent of points in a season; that much of an edge equates to a dominant performance. In his prime, Nadal had on several occasions won nearly 70 percent of the points in his matches at Roland-Garros. In his prime, it sometimes appeared he was landing eight haymakers in a row on an insensate corpse.
//
Then, while serving for the set, Nadal fell into a 0-40 hole he could not crawl out of. Watching him hit his signature shots, I started to see a ghostly overlay of the 2013 Nadal projected over the present-day reality. The 2024 down-the-line forehand pass that bonked into the middle of the net post would have instead arced savagely outside Zverev’s reach before dipping back into the corner of the court, following that infamous “banana” curve. It was possible to see the thrilling, crackling outlines of what Nadal once was, and occasionally the ghost and the present slid into serene alignment, before falling out of sync again. A slow and rickety recovery step, a belabored backhand falling a few feet before the service line, and the illusion dissipated.
//
Three years before, Musetti had taken a two-sets-to-none lead, only for Djokovic to leave the court, change his clothes, and wrest back control of the match, with the crushing inevitability of a bear trap. Musetti retired from that match while getting blown out 4-0 in the fifth set. He said he wasn’t actually injured but had simply realized “there was no chance that I could win a point.”

Chapter 9: Tossing Out the Syllabus
[Djokovic] summons some of his best ball when playing from a place of spite; he is most magnetic and authentic when playing the heel, too.

Chapter 10: Hoard of Gold
My internal terminology for the best Djokovic-Nadal matchups is Wide Tennis. It takes two—and really, only these two—to produce Wide Tennis. When playing lesser opponents, its full parameters cannot be glimpsed. Nadal can spend most of a match perched near the center of the baseline, imposing his entire will on each ball, cracking one crosscourt forehand, then putting the next into the cavernous opening left behind. Djokovic can spend most of a match sitting directly on top of the baseline, taking the ball early, batting it to opposite corners until the end of time. When together, however, they are both hell-bent on hijacking the other from their seat of comfort. The result is a version of tennis that is as visually striking as it is physically baffling. The legal area of play for singles is fringed by two strips known as the doubles alley, which extend the court wider for two-on-two play. But Nadal and Djokovic sprint behind, through, and even beyond these alleys in their singles matches. They travel out to remote locales, then recover back to the center of the court just in time to begin their next far-flung foray. Thus their tennis took on different dimensions. It looked distorted, as if reality’s projectionist had made an error with the aspect ratio.
//
Each man hybridizes offense and defense in a way that commands constant vigilance from the other. Each ball is struck with a reasonable expectation that the next ball will be coming back over the net, perhaps even harder and more angled. Both men intimately understand how difficult it is to hit the ball somewhere that would bother the other. Watching this version of tennis is like reading a text stripped of punctuation marks. Where you’d expect a point to reach its natural conclusion, it simply refuses, instead flowing out into a sequence of shots and sprints and shots and sprints that leaves no room for breath or error.
//
There was a ragged yearning in Djokovic’s body language, but a crystalline refinement in his actual strokes.


OTHER ATP HOPEFULS
Chapter 5: Smiling Through the Swarm
I felt somewhat sad as this man [Auger-Aliassime], who had at one time been considered the future of the sport, was devoured by the actual, undeniable future of the sport.

Chapter 8: Meddy in the Middle
[Medvedev's] personality, too, has left casual fans convinced that he is some enemy of the game. Perhaps they are reading too much into the expansive plain of his forehead, those cunning beady eyes, the physiognomy of a supervillain plotting to take down the power grid.
//
And in the middle of this fretful moment—scrapping with the greats, wondering if he would ever be loved, announcing his disillusionment—he was dealt another devastating fate. Enter the biggest prodigy in decades, seven years Medvedev’s junior, permanently a-grin, and instantly beloved.
//
One boy wonder was a healthy challenge; two of them muddled the future. Long ago, Medvedev had declared that his dreams were dead. Now he observed that tennis no longer held any joy. What was this melancholic Russian novel of a career? He had timed his birth poorly. He should have planned that out better.


TENNIS
Chapter 2: Cabeza, Corazón y Cojones
Tennis is a terminally nostalgic sport, always trying to make sense of its future by using its past.

Chapter 6: Triage Ward
In this way the court takes a record of the tennis played on it. A divot over here where someone took a hard fall after a diving volley. A smear over there where a player slid to retrieve a drop shot. A small comma behind the baseline traced by the back foot while a player served. In the right light, the clay itself looks like soft velour and the footprints look like places it has been thumbed against the grain.

Chapter 7: Joy in Suffering
The crowd is the third participant in every tennis match. It can bend the outcome, like the sun or the wind. If players are shown love by the crowd, they can tap into new reservoirs of confidence. If they are shown scorn—and they happen to be named Novak Djokovic—they can also tap into new reservoirs of confidence.
//
Tennis had gotten brawnier over the decades, but its competitors were still pressed into that display of genteel civility, just seconds after they’d spent four hours wired to kill.

Chapter 9: Tossing Out the Syllabus
Unlike hard court, which sits inert, or clay, which is groomed and restored between matches, the grass cannot be reset. Wimbledon is a story of degradation.
//
Tennis is unambiguous that way. No loss can be blamed on a teammate or coach or external force. You are only as good as your wins.

Chapter 13: Changeover
Level is separable from the player; it can be commented on at a remove, as if a player were holding their own tennis out at arm’s length, putting it up to the light to study it more closely. Level is an instantaneous snapshot of where a player stands—their accuracy, ferocity, ingenuity at a given point of time. It is the result of their training, but also their jet lag, their love life, their legal proceedings, their last meal.

lihim: (Default)
Michelle :) ([personal profile] lihim) wrote2026-01-12 08:25 pm

2025 and 2026 everything megapost

happy 2026! that means it’s time for my yearly tradition of publishing my ins and outs list. Iʼm a really big fan of ins and outs lists, Iʼve been doing them for a few years now. I like lists and taking note of things, in general. I have: last.fm, storygraph, letterboxd, backloggd, listography, and trello accounts. I might be neurotic. that’s a separate problem. I decided to expand and write a 2025-2026 little bit of everything mega-post. it’s very long. I kept writing and writing and writing and it just snowballed in size. I don’t know how to fix it or be more concise.

this is a ridiculously long post )
sleepyshamrocks: (Default)
flo ([personal profile] sleepyshamrocks) wrote2026-01-09 12:35 am
Entry tags:

2025 year in review

long post. long year!!

read more )
fwcu: (renjuns<3)
fwcu ([personal profile] fwcu) wrote2026-01-07 06:23 pm
Entry tags:

a post-literate man... the woman without reading ability... the end of reading and the last Trier...

everytime I say this I really am stealing valour from the subaltern who really can't read and haven't been reading but my god, like, Bruh... uh a very lackluster or normal af reading year for me... 2025 was a year that had a lot going on or maybe not that much going on or maybe I really did become a newer better person or something idk, hard to tell, who knows! who knows! I'm bad at actually making my reading_lists posts and also I've documented my reading and opinions of elsewhere this year... so should I do it again? I don't know... I'm having the reverse of my usual crisis where I don't want to waste time writing because I want to be reading... sorry I have A List to get through... I have a normal sized list....                    and a scary ...         and a real and normal-small amount of books at home... which I bought quite a few books in 2025 [and some within the last week] [and obviously to commemorate nothing, I did a meaning-and-secret-and-impromptu exchange with H where she got me YOUR NAME HERE and I got her the complete cavafy].

Read more... )
rhodochrosite: (Default)
ash ([personal profile] rhodochrosite) wrote2026-01-07 12:31 pm

when you're in a relentless rise to the top of the world competition and your opponent is

compilation of narrative parallels between jannik sinner & oscar piastri. quotes pulled from changeover - giri nathan & oscar piastri: the rookie - andrew van leeuwen.

also re/reading these books side by side was seriously hydrogen bomb vs coughing baby mr nathan are you interested in motorsports...

my crossover machineshipping... )
rhodochrosite: (Default)
ash ([personal profile] rhodochrosite) wrote2026-01-06 11:34 am

writing year in review: 2025

STATS
total number of completed stories: 6 (▲1)
  • ace attorney [1]
  • formula 1 rpf [4]
  • prince of tennis [1]
total wordcount: 31,850

most used tags: Ambiguous Relationships [2] (really should be [3] but i left it off you’ll know it at once because it was a bit too overtly romantic to justify the tag use), Alternate Universe - Always a Different Gender or Sex [2], Background Canon-Typical 2010s Grid Sluttery [2]. spiritually, it was Rivals With Benefits [5, possibly 6 if you count the mialana] but i only actually used that tag once although i did also use Rivals With Benefits Without Benefits and Academic Rivals to Lovers. huge year for rivalshipping for me.

most used rating: e [6] i cannot explain how this happened.

most tagged character: sebastian vettel [2] & charles leclerc [2] & max verstappen [2] omg first year since 2021 that it hasn’t been renjun…


FIC MASTERLIST & COMMENTARY
an indispensable suggestion from afar | ace attorney, mia fey/lana skye

Lana had fully twisted around in her seat to face Mia. Her face shone with intent. This wasn’t the violence of a switchblade; Mia revised her initial impression. It was the incisive examination of a scalpel, a curiosity that cored through flesh in its search for answers. She saw it in the mirror, sometimes.

notes:
  • writing 10k for a 300 word minimum exchange everyone point and laugh… i really just could not shut the fuck uppppp i was too excited about getting to write lawyers finally lol. i think i did more reading for this fic than my actual legal ethics and jurisprudence classes i was locked the fuck in studying up on kantian ethics and californian law. obviously i am no expert in moral philosophy so i have no idea how correct the depiction in this fic ended up being and i also can’t tell if it was giving infodump snoozefest. hopefully it was fun and yuriful and not didactic to read about.
  • pea came up with the idea of basing this around the trolley problem and having mia and lana take opposite stances on the solution, so i do owe her everything!! i think it’s really important that lana strongly supports sacrificing the few to save the many in principle but ultimately in sl9 her love for ema outweighs all other moral considerations, whereas mia doesn’t believe in sacrificing anyone but feels extremely guilty that it means she doesn’t prioritise maya over everyone else. it was a really fun ideological clash to write about, i genuinely loved these stupid philosophical arguments because i’m really pretentious at heart.
  • pretty much every conversation mialana have about the various judges they mention is based on real conversations i’ve had with my coworkers. one thing law nerds love to do is psychoanalyse judge haptics and proxemics much like an rpfujo except maybe half a step less parasocial because there is a fair amount of direct or indirect interaction lawyers have with judges.
  • working title was morality / mortality, borrowed from kamm, but i wanted it to be more hopeful in the end, so i went with a quote from gadamer in conversation: reflections and commentary - gadamer & dutt which was in my own uni jurisprudence class readings:
    • DUTT: ... The neo-conservatives announce the end of socialistic utopian thinking. With the collapse of socialistic dictatorships in the east such thinking is said to be no longer in favor. Must one accept this view, or may one hold fast to your writings from the seventies, according to which for our praxis utopia remains an indispensable "suggestiveness from afar"?
    • GADAMER: Yes I certainly do believe this, and I believe it will continue to be valid in the future...
  • and similarly thematically relevant:
    • GADAMER: Yes, I am very skeptical of every kind of pessimism. I find in all pessimism a certain lack of sincerity.
    • DUTT: Why?
    • GADAMER: Because no one can live without hope.
  • but also the utopia conversation in the last scene borrows about as much from alice in borderland as from gadamer.
  • lana is associated with: labwork, the military, scientific inquiry, observable phenomena. contrast with mia’s association with ghosts and the supernatural identity fuckery of channelling.
  • silly pun names: phillip owen soffi = phil o. soffi = philosophy, ino saint = innocent, o’kaigh = okay, dowtt = doubt, watskryme = what’s crime, chattabocks = chatterbox, tanjent = tangent, killian d’agye = kil d’agye = killed a guy, marnie sayver = money saver.
  • i am really happy with how this fic turned out i think in the long run it will probably be one of my best of all time.

best lines:
Couched in those terms a pleasant apparition of nostalgia arose. She allowed it to pass directly through her, disembodied, so that it did not sour into homesickness.
  • connecting law to medium work, which mia does repeatedly through the fic even though she has ostensibly given up medium work for the law.

Things she had observed about Lana Skye: Lana was one of about four other people in the class who actually did the readings, and out of those four the only one who did not put their hand up solely for the opportunity to listen to the sound of their own voice. Whenever she spoke it was to add something substantive and insightful to the discussion, even if the substance was heinous and the insights fundamentally incorrect.
  • some of the first lines i wrote in the fic i think it’s so funny of mia to respect lana academically but absolutely disrespect the actual content of lana’s academia.

Sometimes the sheer scope of what she didn’t know threatened to overwhelm her. But: Gregory Edgeworth shimmering over her mother’s face like light seen from underwater. Maya in the sun by the sea, agreeing to shoulder the weight of their world. Mia could face anything.
  • stylistically this is how i want to write always but i am not managing it most of the time because i say too much. but this is the goal.

When everything was over, when the truth had come to light, when she was no longer gambling with her family’s lives in the path of a legacy two millennia heavy—then she would tell Lana everything. She’d tell Lana how much she’d wanted to tell her everything. How much she would have treasured hearing anything Lana had to say.
  • kurain is another trolley. and also i think it’s so romantic that mia specifically wants lana to know that she wanted to tell her everything because she always wants to know what lana thinks.

The echelons of law school Mia intended to shoulder-charge her way through ran on gossip, sourced from someone’s cousin’s friend’s sister who was a clerk in the Supreme Court or a family friend of the Chief Justice or dating a court reporter, so nepotistically insular that Mia was immediately annoyed by the tastelessness of the blatant cliquery even as she triaged familiarity with those subjects as a key social priority; she knew she would need allies, contacts, networks, to do what she came here to do. At least in Kurain they were upfront about the precedence of bloodline, no limp pretence at meritocracy.

But Mia listened to her classmates and committed the recurring names to memory. Flashy tax litigator Marnie Sayver had been appointed to the Court of Appeal and the public announcement was imminent; opinions varied as to the wisdom of the Governor’s decision. Byrne Faraday had brought his daughter to Justice Gavelle’s latest chambers party; opinions concurred that she was a charming little girl. The precocious von Karma scion was preparing to make her prosecutorial debut in Germany; opinions were nervously reserved just in case Manfred von Karma was lurking bogeyman-style around some shadowy corner.

She’d heard Franziska von Karma was the same age as Maya. All Mia could imagine was Maya alone in the summoning chamber, swathed in ceremonial white, their mother’s headpiece slipping down her forehead. What Mia had laid down to come here, what she had left to Maya to bear. Two decades of preparation shed like a robe. She wanted to shield Maya from it as long as she could but it was, after all, her own actions that had crowned Maya with that cold weight, Maya’s future taken as consideration for a chance to exhume the truth. Her own hands tying Maya to the tracks. Mia rarely prayed anymore but sometimes she still found herself interlacing her fingers and shutting her eyes. Oh, mother. Please let me be right. Please let me have chosen the right thing to do, so I have not turned Maya into a living mausoleum for nothing.
  • forgive the longass excerpt but this whole section is my favourite part of the fic i think i did a good job with the prose here. mia sacrificing maya for her pursuit of justice is really fucking her up because of her competing moral responsibility to her sister and even though maya has given mia permission to do it which according to lana would make it acceptable in the kantian sense because maya’s agency is being respected mia is still understandably really conflicted. in a lot of ways this whole fic is about the insulated circle of university academic discussion and how it intersects or doesn’t intersect with what happens in the real world / the gap between intent and act.

Part of Mia’s training regimen back in Kurain had involved meditating behind a waterfall, which was meant to improve her resilience and focus in the face of great adversity or maybe just keep her too hypothermically miserable to muster up the energy to complain. That great icy deluge of water, all its shattering, lethal force, separated from her only by the span of a hand. Sitting on the smooth granite slab that had borne the weight of hundreds of damp and shivering Fey women before her she had felt the sting of the sheer concentrated cold radiating out from the torrent more acutely than the spray that misted over the parts of her skin her robes left exposed. You did not escape the deadly thing simply by moving aside.
  • really like this section too especially in context in the middle of dialogue. the point is that the trolley problem isn’t even a binary kill one save many / let many die save one because so many other consequences flow out from the decision including for the lever puller.

Lana flinched but stayed silent. With some difficulty, Mia pinpointed the feeling sloshing through her ribs as envy.

“It’s not a criticism,” Mia said softly.

“You’re a sister, too,” Lana said. “You know.”
  • again very important to me that mia envies lana’s ability to prioritise her sister above all else because mia thinks that’s what she should do as well, but she can’t because of who she is as a person.

They had gotten through their customary post-Soffi library study session and the rest of the evening into the night without talking about the fight, but it hung so near over Mia’s head, unresolved and maybe unresolvable, she almost felt it kissing her brow with the coldness of metal. She didn’t have to drag it out again. But Mia could not resist speaking. The advocate’s curse: it was impossible to let a sleeping witness lie.
  • callback to previous section about maya taking on the kurain ceremonial headdress. also yeah one thing about mialana they are talking about something or other no matter what because they really rate each other even if they disagree. it’s like… if they drove for competing teams but had really clean and enjoyable wheel to wheel battles… Just Like


see the static from a mile away | formula 1 rpf, mark webber/sebastian vettel (r63)

Somehow, without his permission, Mark’s body has walked itself closer to Sebastian, as if magnetised. She has to tip her head back to look at him, baring her throat. It’s not such a bad view.


notes:
  • i think this is the worst thing i’ve ever written, in the value judgment sense. I’m Sorry Women. i genuinely got kind of upset during the writing process because mark pov required me to be so mean and uncharitable about seb i was getting really defensive over seb mistreatment and erasure like girl the words are being typed by your own hands. you ever accidentally become a hater for your ship in the course of writing fic for your ship lol.
  • but i do think this is my rb era markseb manifesto even though it just looks like toxic evil hetslop pwp because it is ultimately about mark being so paranoid and insecure and resentful and delusional and complexed about seb and on 500 levels of cognitive dissonance and self-justification. like he’s enacting all this violence and humiliation and force on seb in an attempt to exert power and control over her but seb baited him into it on purpose so really even when mark ostensibly has the upper hand seb is still winning, which mark is also cognisant of but purposefully refusing to confront every time he comes up against it. unfortunately for mark seb wants everything he could possibly do to her.
  • mark feels entitled to victory and red bull’s favour by virtue of his seniority and having put in the years of effort only for all of what he thinks he has surely earned to be stolen from under his nose. it’s the classic hardworking veteran vs upstart prodigy rookie storyline except mark is of course ignoring all the hard work that seb puts in too. and also the fact that seb has never done anything wrong ever. and also the fact that SKILL ISSUE. and in the end my driver took home 4 wdcs in a row and mark never even got a runner-up. what was i saying?
  • it is r63 into het because i was really trying to make this as evil as possible. also mark’s sense of entitlement and the violence that he wants to do to seb because of his wounded pride and his dismissal of seb’s abilities and her right to be in the position she is becomes even more awful bc of the specifically gendered element of older man vs younger woman which the fic doesn’t directly look at because mark isn’t overtly thinking about it but It Is There and very much informing his attitude towards seb. iiii think it’s fun and hot, a little bit of misogyny as a treat.
  • seb and nico being girls (who did not work it out on the remix) is soooo important to me btw they should always be the same, my beautiful two sides of the same coin blonde (loosely defined) german divas. whether seb actually did anything with nico or if she’s just winding mark up is up to the reader which is why i only tagged jenson/seb since there is objective evidence that it happened. although i did also then write the sico prequel so it did happen to me.
  • i don’t think this fic succeeds at doing much else other than being evil but at the very least it exorcised the markseb demons from my mind (temporarily??) like there was a solid month where i genuinely could not think about anything else i was getting so distracted at work it was so bad for me. anyway it cracks me up that markseb immediately started liking each other so much and undivorcing the moment they stopped being teammates but this also caused me to lose all interest in them, i only want markseb at max toxicity and antipathy in their teammates of dark era, i get my real true love fix from 3316.
  • title from ohmami - chase atlantic, my kings of feminism card declined music.

best lines:
“I am thinking,” Sebastian repeats, more loudly, “that you are angry at me because you are out of the title fight, but really if you are angry at anyone it should be yourself, or maybe Felipe for the Monza DNF, though if you were not so far down the grid you wouldn’t have been fighting him for P6 anyway. But you couldn’t even beat Jenson today. And I was already one hundred and seventeen points ahead of you after Monza. What makes you think you were fighting against me?”
  • i could hear this in seb’s voice in my mind so i think i did a pretty good job with the german esl diction and the (justifiably! seb’s 2011 season was incredible!) cocky attitude.

For a moment that post-race paralytic fury overwhelms him so completely he forgets how to breathe. He could hit her. He can almost see it like a cooldown room replay: the snap of her head to the side, the shock in her eyes, her hand moving to shield her reddening cheek, too slow for once. His palm prickles with the phantom sensation of it, sweet as clean air.
  • my favourite section of the fic 🙂‍↕️ markseb crazy size & strength difference meaning that even a light tap or push from mark has seb stumbling and losing balance → mark should slap seb around it would be hot and also satisfying for both of them.

She’s not interesting to look at. He can’t stop looking anyway.
  • i love writing extremely unreliable narrators… mark wants to devalue seb sooo bad but the objective reality is that seb is a very good driver who is performing better than him and he is in fact psychologically fixated on her. Mark’s Sebastian Complex!

Mark has wanted her since he looked at her slumped and cradling her neck in her hand and glowing with exhilaration in the passenger seat of his car on the way to the airport and thought, well, she’s probably never gonna make it to F1, that’s a shame. Mark wants her even when he wants to cave her skull in. // He shifts his grip on her throat so his palm curves around the side instead. Gently now. A cradle for a sore and unready neck. Maybe that had been the last time he’d really been in the driver’s seat, when it comes to Sebastian.
  • one of my fave bits of markseb lore i had to get it in here plus the whole thing about seb’s neck being too weak when test driving back then worked so well with the choking kink parts of this fic. it’s telling also that mark can’t help but have these flashes of gentleness towards seb in between the violent sexual fantasies/acts, i think he genuinely did like seb but the bitterness and paranoia and toxic competitiveness made everything go sour and once the cause of that was removed he went back to liking seb.

He has the sense of snuffing a candle out, the stinging flare of heat just before the nothingness.
  • this is literally top3 lines i wrote this year. and like brother YOU’RE the one who is about to be nothing.


cruel with my intention | formula 1 rpf, sebastian vettel (r63)/nico rosberg (r63)

Sebastian keeps looking at her. Intent and relentless as a knife. Under the dimly strobing lights all of her shines silver.

“Here,” Sebastian says. Her fingers at Nico’s jaw suddenly gentle. “I will show you what it’s like, with him. Close your eyes.”


notes:
  • two drunk girls making out at the club for the male gaze panopticon is unfortunately one of my favourite brands of yuri. i wanted to write toxic and evil companion yuri sico fic to my markseb fic about sico competing over a man, or really several men. prissy superfeminine ice princess nico and tomboy demon baby seb having coreografia de britney spears (lol) rivalry sex i would like to see it… not that i really even ended up writing very much of it.
  • the yuri is a trojan horse for the het which is a smaller trojan horse for the yuri. basically i am intending to alienate all possible audiences. but i think all of that is really just a red herring for what this fic is really about which is how nico wants to win sooo badly she would ruin literally every other aspect of her life to make it happen. and she does <3
  • i did intend for it to be a lot more about lewis than it ended up being but i think that’s kind of what sico are like… you think it’s about lewis and it obviously quite fundamentally is but also it isn’t. but it is but it isn’t.
  • i think early 2010s / pre silver war nico is sooooo especially cutely transparently insecure and emotive <this video> is never too far from my mind, the way nico’s face visibly falls when he thinks his dad said something uncomplimentary about him like omg youuuu are so desperate for external validation it’s unreal. the seeds of mid 2010s absolute nightmare menhera gf nico are in there but not yet sprouted and it’s seb who is the terrorist demon baby for now. obviously beyond the scope of this fic but i really am so obsessed with how seb and nico trade narrative roles over time with lewis as the fulcrum and i would really like to write 2015/16 trenches sebcedes for real eventually! there is a little bit of dramatic irony terror at the end because it’s true that it’s seb’s reign now but nico’s time is coming in a couple more years and seb will never reach these heights again and nico is going to take SO much vindictive delight in every moment of seb’s downfall, darkest day of seb’s career putting it in the wall at his legendary home race which he has never won etc, but at the same time when nico is trying to psych out her ex mid-divorce it’s still seb she turns to for assistance and cooperation, and it’s seb who defends nico’s right to the title because she saw and understood the work nico put in to get it.
  • like i think sico being two sides of the same coin, sometimes i think you might hate me sometimes i think i might hate you maybe you just wanna be me, is so narratively special and important! i love nico’s inferiority complex about golden girl seb and i love seb bullying nico in the way that a child stomps on ants and i love the looming shadow of schumi and the offscreen locus of lewis. the image i have is of seb who is unapologetically herself in all of her cockiness and greed and ego being this very pure existence, the freudian id so to speak, not actually malicious and actually quite nice even, whereas nico who is constantly trying (and failing) to repress how badly she is gagging for Literally Everything that she wants ends up worse off because she cares about how she looks from the outside and stops herself from going after the things she wants and then doesn’t get them and is bitter and spiteful and mean about it, of course culminating in her ultimate pyrrhic victory of world championship at the cost of true love. which is to be fair a trolley problem that seb has not ever had to face. but also i think that even if seb had won the championship in 2017 or 2018 against lewis things between them would not have gone like they did for brocedes they would have made it out fine, the love would not have died. being teammates has ruined more soulmates than all the volcanoes lmao.
  • at this stage in the timeline obviously sewis aren’t really that close yet, they’re just friendly coworkerivals with benefits and they won’t fall in love until many years later, so nico genuinely doesn’t even have anything to be concerned about. in my mind her feelings for lewis are reciprocated but lewis probably hasn’t realised it yet unlike the way that nico is agonisingly pining and by the time lewis does it will be too late for them. lowkey like omg girl just sleep with him already you’re already both separately hooking up with all the same people. but of course what nico feels about lewis is too closely-held and huge and awful for her to do that. which is, as usual, nico’s loss.
  • title from reprogram - kilo kish, which is a song that is kind of way too beautiful for this fic but it has this simultaneous icy artifice and glassy confessional fragility that registers as so nico to me. probably i should have saved it for a serious brocedes fic but we are here now.

best lines:
And she prefers, in principle, to be where she’s wanted. The practice is trickier. The principle presupposes the want.
  • i think this is very nico… pr princess desperate enough for external validation to subject herself to various mortifying ordeals… and ofc the extreme emotional masochism displayed in the post silver war era by constantly putting herself in situations where she has to face The Concept Of Lewis. girl you are lowkey doing it to yourself.

Finally Nico manages to wrench her hand free of Sebastian’s grasp, or Sebastian lets go, or both at the same time, equal and opposite. She clutches her hand to her chest and stares, speechless and furious at herself for it.
  • two opposing forces that cancel each other out… two sides of the same coin… nico always being on the back foot around seb despite all her attempts at diplomacy and image management <3

“Sure,” Nico says, and then she must suffer some kind of horrific aneurysm in the part of her brain responsible for oral motor skills because she finds herself blurting out, “Is Lewis—”

Sebastian pulls back. Her mouth is shiny with spit and Nico’s smeared lipgloss. “You want Lewis to see?”

“No,” Nico says. Her heart has become a gravel trap, pulse skidding and slowing and spinning out. “No, of course not. It’s—we’re just friends. Why would I—no.”
  • ya romance emotion. And Lewis Was There!
  • i really like the combination of nico’s miserable crush that she has been circling around for years vs seb’s tactless directness. i like the gravel trap metaphor also, i am always feeling like i’m doing too much or being too cliche when i do racing related figurative language but i think this one was good.

Her head swims, oxygen deprivation, heatstroke, symptom of something that might kill her. She’s raced through worse.
  • associating seb with unpleasant/deadly things but that’s also part of racing.

Lewis’s hand on the nape of her neck. Sebastian’s hand on the championship trophy. Nico’s hand on the nape of Sebastian’s neck, the skin there smooth and warm like metal that’s soaked up the sun. What that shining ridged silver might feel like against her palm. Sebastian knows, Lewis knows. Nico will know.
  • obv linking seb/lewis/nico/the wdc trophy together, nico’s conflation of seb and lewis and victory is all about Things She Wants. it’s narratively important that nico ultimately feels unsatisfied/unhappy when she gets off with seb not just because it’s oops all bottoms but also because it’s foreshadowing how she’ll feel about lewis and how she’ll feel about the championship too.

“Seb,” Nico says, not entirely sure what she means to follow it up with. Five languages worth of words and she’s still at a loss. She is always floundering for grip, for pace, around Sebastian. The knowledge does not make it any easier to bear.
  • nico… oh nico… my glasshearted ojousama trying so hard to do mind games but not being able to pull them off… trying to launch psychological attacks on seb only for seb to nuke her right back twice as hard and with half the effort because seb doesn’t have any image maintenance reasons to hold back like nico does. and nico knows this and keeps trying anyway. that’s what seb really means when she says you are always trying because seb knows this also.
  • my favourite brand of sico is nico trying to gain some upper hand over seb and seb effortlessly turning the tables and nico being at a loss as to how to respond. And Lewis Was There.


you’ll know it at once | formula 1 rpf, max verstappen/charles leclerc

The scent hits Max like a bullet. So sweet and heavy it is a violence. It dislocates him completely; it’s like he’s looking at Charles from somewhere slightly to the left of himself.

notes:
  • i started this like 5 days before mich’s birthday thinking i’d probably be gifting it belatedly with apologies and then locked in so hard over the weekend i was done 2 days early and then i just had to sit there with the draft not saying anything which was agonisingggg. as with the rest of my f1 output i do not know what came over me lmao sometimes the omegaverse devil speaks into my ear. i’ve written secret omega trope before and i was intending to fully self-plagiarise and do Extremely Resolved Sexual Tension But Extremely Unresolved Emotional Tension 2.0 but i literally unironically believe in 3316 real true love too much. it is actually so bad. yes i took the government propaganda yaoibait everyone point and laugh. all mich’s fault btw. this fic is so horrifically sappy i am never going to be able to reread it without looking through my fingers like i’m watching a horror movie. but i could not have done it without the power of friendship so in the end Thank You Mich, i do love and care mich so much i gave up the bit i had planned for my sports pseud debut and posted f1 instead of tennis rpf first.
  • ssfwl is the most capital-L Love song that i know so i couldn’t think of a more appropriate title source. working title was you knew you were breakable from <one-act play in which no knives are used - dalton day> which is also a top5 most romantic poems of all time to me but a bit more terror and a bit less sparkly shoujo screentones than the fic ended up being so i had to switch it out. i cannot emphasise enough how much i did not intend for this fic to be so gayass_song.mp3, it just happened somehow. as if it’s my fault 3316 is just so inherently romantic?? yes i’m delusional. but so are they.
  • i did continuously forget i was writing omegaverse instead of normal sex and had to go back and add more omegaverse trope indicia like slick / glowing eyes (literally love this trope btw its so funny) etc i guess i mostly just wanted to microdose biologically enforced d/s. i just feel like it’s so embarrassing to do worldbuilding in pwps lmao so you can really see where i gave up explaining anything. it was most important to me to 1) make brocedes da bus driver 2) mention 2x oscar podium for the hOPium of it all 3) make my ge0rge and p1astri stances clear although let me clarify also that it’s 3381 in that order, max is my superseme.
  • what happened in 2016 was of course nico deciding that omega pheromones are fair game when it comes to psychological warfare techniques and weaponising the fuckkk out of strategically timed heats and “forgetting” to use scent blockers to mess with lewis (haven’t decided on his dynamic so i’m leaving it open LOL) which did take some delicate tactical balancing to execute without affecting his own driving and this created a paddock / cooldown room environment so toxic and chaotic as naturally lewis was not the only person affected by nico’s biological terrorism so the fia were like ok so this can absolutely never happen again. seb was having the time of his life though, brocedes divorce only toxic to miserable people he was having a fucking ball.
  • i have also just remembered i was going to microdose misogyny as well but i forgot to actually do it. in my mind mating meant that the alpha can force the omega to obey them which is why max refused to do it even though he obviously wouldn’t ever actually order charles to submit in a racing context because competing against charles is his passion. but it’s ok they are both too reckless to hold off forever so i think they get mated during #charles1stwdc celebration sex and it’s fine things are exactly the same as they were before except they can do biologically enforced d/s too for fun. yay for true love!
  • on review i should have put more praise kink in but i also forgot i was doing that. dude i forgot literally everything like the way the sheer thought of 3316 romance instantly mindwipes me. i definitely also should have picked a specific season/race for spatiotemporal grounding other than vaguely european but i couldn’t decide on which one so i picked nothing.
  • it’s not really a standout line but i did want to point out max cushioning the back of charles’s head with his hand so he doesn’t hit his head on the tile even in the middle of fairly rough and mindless sexpollened sex. this is the sex version of max racing charles more respectfully than he races other people.
  • wanted also to point out that charles went to red bull when he was instinctively seeking the closest possible safety, obviously because he could subconsciously sense that max would be there as well, because they are perfect soulmates and the universe will conspire to bring them together trusttt. they don’t know that yet but i do.
  • max biting charles’ wrist is ofc intended to be mating bond lite but also charles biting max first is important for equality and fairness and balance reasons, which i think is sooo vital to endgame ships even when there is a clearly defined and unassailable 1/0 dynamic. there must be equilibrium in order for things to last forever and mark my fucking words 3316 will last forever. in case it wasn’t clear they’re meant to be touching each other’s pulse points at the end so would be able to tell that their heartbeats are synced up even though they aren’t mated again because they are perfect soulmates <3
  • all in all i really like this fic despite the horrible sappiness i think i represented my views, which are horribly sappy, accurately and it gives me heartfluttering romance feelings even though i am the one who wrote it and usually that would prevent me from having any positive feelings about the fic. just goes to show how much i like 3316 damn they really got me with this one.

best lines:
He can see now that Charles isn’t actually still at all. He is trembling, minutely, with the effort of holding himself in place. An engine primed and ready to leap forward. Any moment the lights will go out.
  • like i said before i am scared that doing racing metaphors in f1 fic is coming off a bit florals for spring? groundbreaking… but i think this is a nice image and conveys the massive effort of restraint teetering on loss of control.

Adrenaline breaks over Max’s head like a cold plunge.
  • i liked this line. trying to get a bit more creative with the language i reach for.

The thing with him and Charles is all context. Track limits, the four corners of the paddock. A decade and change of adjacency, shared podiums, peripheral vision, the best and brightest and most beautiful part of his life, and absolutely nothing outside of that. It’s just that they don’t have much in common, except for the only thing that matters. He hadn’t always been looking out for Charles, necessarily, but at some point Charles had become so integral to his conceptualisation of what it meant to race that it turned axiomatic. A race necessitates someone to race against. And there’s nobody Max can imagine racing against more vividly than Charles.
  • whenever i got stuck i just started typing out my 3316 meta thoughts into the gdoc which is why there’s random chunks of navelgazing studded throughout the fic but this really is my 3316 thesis… extreme situational closeness and imaginary fated rivalry is the most romantic thing in the universe?

“I’m not going to knot you in a fucking bathroom,” Max says. “My PT will kill me, and your PT will kill you and then also kill me a second time.”
  • i thought this was funny :)

Max has no doubts that Charles has the capability for it, the same way he has no doubts about his own. He expects it from Charles: you will match me. However far I go, you will be there to fight me for it.
  • anyone else die and blow up over max saying very matter of factly that he always expected charles would make it to f1 if max himself did.

The imprint of the tiles against his cheek looks almost like balaclava marks.
  • everything is sex except sex which is racing… or everything is racing except racing which is sex.

It’s how he looks on a podium, radiant in his contentment, something serene under the elation like the world is only settling into the shape it should always have been.
  • thinking specifically of how relieved charles looked on the podium at monaco and monza which genuinely moved me almost to tears i’m ngl. but i literally think it’s trueeeee that charles belongs on the podium and if he isn’t on there it’s the universe(/FERRARI) that is wrong.
  • this whole paragraph in general i really like even though it’s so sappy the rest of it should not be in this section. but well 3316 real true love my final message goodbye.


set that crown on the ground | prince of tennis, kirihara akaya/echizen ryoma

Kirihara glances back down at his phone screen. On the opposite side to Kirihara, the only other name on the drawsheet that matters: R. ECHIZEN.

notes:
  • wrote this in like 1.5 crazed sessions and then nearly died waiting for fiab reveals which kept getting delayed for a full month or something omfg like… keep fucking my girl bro i don’t even care anymore. it is really unfortunate that it’s taken me 3829382992 years to write giftfic for ciel and it should have been dreampuri but… well…. world’s flakiest writer and friend that’s me… did laugh that ciel and i ended up both gifting boysboysboys kiriryom of light to each other. really grateful to ciel for having prompts that finally gave me the right impetus to write for kiriryom.
  • lots of futurevision seeding here, i was pulling from some extremely old wips and rotations including kiriryom brazil arc fic. relevantly: marui is an idol, yukimura sanada tezuka are pro players, shiraishi is studying medicine, tokugawa is ryoma’s unnamed coach. ryoma has a fila sponsorship naturally, kirihara is signed to nike like 90% of the rest of the tour.
  • i think what makes kiriryom special amongst all their other rivalries is that they are weirdly able to ground/humanise each other despite generally being huge freaks unlike eg ryoma’s young gods fated rivalry with kinchan. like they can pull the Just Boys out of each other when they need it the most / when they’re feeling alienated from their tennis. which is a function of their shared history in general but also junior selectionals and hero/villain narrative framing roleswap panel sequence my beloveds. kirihara is of course wired to love anything that kills him but i think he is highly intuitive and would Get It when ryoma is going through some shit.
  • a lot of character development has taken place offscreen and i am not sure if that was coming across appropriately or if they just seemed ooc but i think it is a natural progression from kirihara’s shinteni onwards therapisation and world of light that he would be able to learn control and restraint even if it takes him more effort than a normal person and is an unnatural state of being to him.
  • still, so nice to be writing for real tennis again! very comforting and familiar waters to me. nice to not be second guessing every characterisation and dialogue choice since i’ve done such comprehensive tennis studies already lol.
  • anyway i really need kiriryom and sincaraz on the atp tour together… my rookie ace prodigy rival shippings <3 sinnerkiri would make me smile… kirihara famously likes a guy with religious motifs after all.

best lines:
Sinner blew him out of Indian Wells last year in a straight-sets second-round crashout so awful that one break down in the second set his vision had briefly gone red and staticky, in the way it hadn’t since he’d met Shiraishi.
  • “awful” maybe one of my words of the year. jannik cameo sooo self-indulgent here but i think the comparison to yukimura and ryoma is justified!! i’ve been on that jannik~yukimura parallels grind… biblical themes (aesthetic only), unkillable guy who is killed anyway by one specific guy, polite society media trained spokesperson offcourt terminator killbot oncourt, delicate victorian maiden constitution, hiatus from sport due to unavoidable external factors, playstyle that prioritises brutality and efficiency over flashiness, europeanocity.

Tennis settles him too. It always does, or at least it does now, the old uncontrollable fury bridled and wrestled into a definite shape. A weapon is only useful if it does what it’s told. Another thing he’s learned. What has Echizen learned, since they last met on the court?
  • precursor to re/discovering tenimuho together? the weapon in question is tennis techniques, but also kirihara himself.

Tennis does not always love him as much as he loves tennis. Kirihara’s used to that; things rarely do. Echizen, probably, is not.
  • my favourite lines i wrote all year! i know ciel loves ryom having a torture labyrinth struggle era so i was alluding to it here. and i think kirihara would have a fair bit of sympathy for it as guy whose entire life has been torture labyrinth struggle era.

It’s what he imagines Muga no Kyoichi must have felt like; he doesn’t have any memory of the state. It passed through him and left no trace. He’d ask Echizen, if he thought Echizen had an answer.
  • orgasm==muga made me laugh a bit but i do describe them in quite similar ways so the comparison insisted on itself really. this is meant to be a bit wistful though in the sense that kirihara is on the outside of the magic, only intersecting briefly with it via muga which he isn’t conscious for, and possibly permanently locked out of tenimuho for the same reason that yukimura is. like it’s fine because kirihara can win and deserve to win without tenimuho, which is what yukimura proved to him. i really like postcanon fic that is heavy on nostalgia/wistfulness so that was kind of an underlying tone i was trying to hit despite the various jokes and banter.


two’s a crowd | formula 1 rpf, max verstappen/oscar piastri/charles leclerc

What is anyone supposed to say in this kind of situation? Hi. Our mutual coworker-slash-rival sent me here. I'm pretty sure he wants me to have sex with you. Hope that's okay.

notes:
  • ok so yes i technically finished and posted this in 2026 but i am backdating it into 2025 soon because i don’t think i want it on my 2026 slate 😭 I WISH THIS WAS BETTER THAN IT IS. one day i will accept that i am simply not built to write sex comedy but i am going to keep trying probably. i think the difference between this and you’ll know it at once is laughable and not in a good way. i’m sorry ellen i will show a better image to you in the future 🙏
  • the way this fic came about is that i spent weeks complaining about really wanting to write more porn but not having any ideas for what to write and then charles was at the fia gala even though ferrari didn’t win shit in f1 and then max who was supposed to be there was not. and obviously oscar was there. also the 2024 gala had beautiful images of 3316 using oscar as a messenger pigeon between them which was priming me for 338116. previously i made a joke about max being like i’m gonna go do le mans oscar can you keep my wife company (although i mean charles would probably also be doing le mans as part of max’s genetically engineered frankenstein supersoldier driver 331416 dream team lineup) so i saw the opportunity for max to lob cute new boytoy at charles in his absence. also the thought of max doing engineer roleplay for 8116 made me laugh. and nothing is more motivating to me than jokes.
  • the dynamics i had in mind (obv with Rivalry and Competition as bedrock): 81->16 oscar down atrocious silly spaghetti dropping middleschooler crush, 33<-81 cargijinka4cargijinka mentorhero worship want him want to be him crush, 3316 IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHERRRR but haven’t talked about it so they just have a lot of sex instead. in my mind they started hooking up on race weekends in 2023 “casually” and now they’re established in every way except actually but they have a job (racing each other) so they don’t really care about that rn. and they both like oscar :) rookie prodigy sandwiched between veterans And They Were All Competitionpilled Race Freaks. in this fic it’s mostly 3316 whacking each other with the baseball bat that is oscar (they’re having fun) but as oscar gains experience he will be more active. though of course the order will always be 338116.
  • key oscar traits i tried to highlight: extremely fast rate of learning / the I Get It Now of it all, sarcasm to cover up nerves and or preemptively steel himself against rejection, “He always thought everyone was his mate, and he'd get bullied, bullied off the road”, undying perseverance, car. i know every 81 fan and their dog has complained about the media iceman branding because it’s so laughably untrue like just because my close personal friend oscar piastri has dry humour and a bit of pr training and a #contemplative resting face doesn’t mean he has no feelings or doesn’t care?! i think it’s fairly obvious that oscar in fact has a lot of feelings and is actually even quite expressive it’s just a bit more subtle on him and also i think he has defense mechanisms up on top of being less outwardly emotive and good at keeping his calm. oscar get behind meeeee.
  • did touch a few of my landmines but it was jokes so it was okay probably… still feel conflicted about the c*ck chair joke cause i kind of really dislike the word as a stable societyist but you know in the end max is handling the situation and i have nothing to worry about.
  • is this a safe space to say that i really do not understand the appeal of nipple play like i thought i would challenge myself to write it for the sake of diversity in my explicit fic but i still don’t get it and i don’t think it ended up sexy anyway because i just wanted it to be over so i could move onto the parts of the sex that were actually hot. i’m just going to stick to breathplay going forward i hope nobody has any problems with reading vanilla sex with mild choking pwp #94835794389438435 from me i’m the most one trick pony of all time.
  • i have noticed with my past few pwps that i keep doing like explicitnesspadding by referencing sex that the characters could be having but are not currently having because i don’t want to write it. this fic also suffers from this problem. i will probably keep doing it.
  • working title was run it all from my 2025 mvp song money on the dash - elley duhe which has been working double shifts on my running playlist and my writing playlist, my two most listened to playlists of the year although my brocedes playlist put in a decent last minute challenge, but then when i was doing irl sprints with mich in a cafe that was playing normal ed sheeran acoustic guitar ballad cafe music suddenly hotel room service came on and it really was like a divine sign that ellen was in the room with us. and it feels much better to have a jokes title for this fic. was tossing up between meet me at the and two’s a crowd and ultimately went with the latter but i do kind of like the effect of the unfinished title.

best lines:
Charles is genuinely so beautiful it induces an agonised and abstractly despairing breathlessness in Oscar every time he allows himself to really look at Charles, a bit like being lightly stabbed in the lung by a snapped rib; Oscar would know. // The perforated-lung feeling intensifies.
  • i think this captures the feeling of having a horrible and extremely embarrassing crush.

“The Garmin clashed with the suit so I didn’t bring it with me,” Oscar says. “Sorry. No way for me to show you the data.”
  • i wanted to make a garmin joke soooo bad. apparently oscar uses a “whoop” but it just doesn’t flow the same like wtf is a whoop… mich suggested to change it back to garmin so i did. i actually don’t even have a garmin myself i just use my phone to track my run stats but all my coworkers who are serious about running have garmins so this is my attempt at rectifying the fomo.

“It is of course good to win, but better when it is a challenge. Why else do we go racing? I mean, I might as well do laps by myself.”
  • i could hear this in max’s voice in my head so i think i got his speech patterns right :)

Shining and monumental in Oscar’s field of vision.
  • again… oscar your crush on charles!

“Ha! He does that,” Max says. “He’ll push you, so just push back until he stops.”
  • this line makes me smile. i may be biased.

The grand slam at your home race, Qatar before it all went to shit, my Turn 9 overtake on Lando in Abu Dhabi, what did you think, how am I doing, is this how it felt for you.
  • i really like this line so much and i couldn’t tell you why because it isn’t even that good. but every time i started feeling like i was unfixably flopping i would just scroll down to this line and reread it and feel better enough about my abilities to keep going.

It’s not a question. Max speaks like he’s willing the world into the form he wants it to take and the world has no choice but to comply. And Oscar is all formless want, ache up to his teeth, desperate for direction, tuned to the exact frequency of Max’s voice with shattering gratitude.
  • oscar your crush on max… it’s really cute to me how much he loves talking to max about racing. when you are both car freaks <3

“I think probably that was Zone 2 cardio the whole time. Maybe I will log it on Strava.”
  • stole the zone 2 cardio joke from a beloved (& garmin wearing, ofc) coworker but the strava joke is my own and it does make me laugh.


REFLECTIONS
looking back, did you expect to write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?
more than i expected even though it wasn’t even that much, mostly because f1 unlocked jobless levels of writing motivation and productivity in me in late q4 except i do have a job so that wasn’t good.

what pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January?
um…………………………. well here is the exact chain of events that led to the position i am in right now:
  • SOMETIME BETWEEN 2004-2006: arbitrarily i decide that ferrari is my favourite car brand because it is a nice assortment of letters to look at and say.
  • JULY 2021: youtube algo shows me a video about rookie rising star jannik sinner being the future of men’s tennis so i semi-arbitrarily decide he will be my nextgen pick to keep an eye on in the post-federer era.
  • SOMETIME IN 2021 OR 2022: during a call with dia she tells me that if i ever got into f1 i would probably onepick charles leclerc because i am a known enjoyer of fate and doom narratives. i immediately forget his name but i do remember his Il Predestinato epithet due to being known enjoyer of fate and doom narratives.
  • AUGUST 2025: twitter fyp shows me a tweet about jannik sinner and carlos alcaraz allegedly wearing the same jacket and as an average boyfriend jacket enjoyer [i was unaware they are both sponsored by nike so it probably wasn't even actually boyfriend jacket]. i decide to investigate and spend my birtheve night clicking into every tweet in a yaoi moments compilation thread made by an italian fujo to highlight the captions and google translate them individually. i engage in 5374958394843 pages of heated debate with myself over order and regretfully conclude that it is probably governed by match outcomes and/or atp ranking even though it pains me as a switch/reverse hater.
  • SEPTEMBER 2025: i wake up at 4am on a work day to watch jannik sinner lose the us open. twitter fyp shows me a tweet about formula 1 driver charles leclerc seeing a fox on the track. notable fox-associated individuals who i watch with interest famously include jannik sinner, amuro tooru and huang renjun. i find out that charles leclerc drives for ferrari. i find out that jannik sinner is a tifoso whose onepick is charles leclerc. i re-find out that Il Predestinato is charles leclerc. i make unwise jokes about being susceptible to signs and symbols and cults and hype moments and aura. i make even more unwise decisions to watch the baku race so i have something to tide me over until the next sincaraz tournament which carlos alcaraz ends up pulling out of anyway. i obviously understand instantly that charles leclerc is the 0 of all time and enquire about any relevant 1s in his vicinity and mich confirms that there is indeed driver number 1 himself in close narrative proximity. i continue to make unwise decisions. i ignore mich’s warnings about taking this tifosi shit too seriously. i get my nails painted rosso corsa. i write nearly 20k in a month. i buy a 1:43 scale model of the sf24 for my work desk. i go off the deep end about 3316 to extents not seen since sanayuki 2020. i experience misery to extents not seen since i literally don’t even remember when. i don’t have another good day for the rest of the year except for the brief euphoria of mcl double dsq at vegas. etc etc…

i really really like 3316 if that isn’t clear lmao i am extremely not immune to NothingWhereThereShouldBeSomething ships based on mutual delusion and historical revisionism, as you may know. real true rivalrymarriage love btw like instant ship of all time status. i wish i had any sense of emotional object permanence so i could powerscale 3316 against my other All Time ships (jmrn, compromise, serenade, snyk/ykak, akam, clato, etc) accurately but i will have to wait until the honeymoon period is over to compare. i am assuming i will become less hysterical and stupid about 3316 at some point this year.

did you take any writing risks this year? what did you learn from them?
i guess i wrote a lot of porn including tropes i don’t usually do (r63 into het, a/b/o, phone sex). as usual i don’t think i really learned anything, although i was joking with pea that i’m training my ability to write linear action. don’t know if i improved in that though.

best story of the year?
an indispensable suggestion from afar, which is also the only non pwp fic i wrote this year so kind of an automatic winner as it has actual substance. but i do also think it has some of my best writing and imagery and extended metaphors and #meaningful #themes in it. i’m still really proud of it and i think i executed the things i set out to do well.

favourite story of the year?
it’s you’ll know it at once purely because 3316 is my favourite ship of the year. i think out of my f1 output this year cruel with my intention was my best objectively but i am so unbelievably biased i love my fucking shippppppp. i really cannot emphasise enough how much 3316 makes me smile and giggle and kick my feet and feel like i’m dying so much that it doesn’t even matter what i actually wrote just the idea of having made My Ship Real is enough, it’s unfortunately really that serious for me.

most popular story of the year?
the stats on you’ll know it at once scared me i think it hit 100 kudos after one day despite being archive locked and it’s now sitting just over 300 even though it is substanceless omegaverse pwp. this was especially shocking to me because the other f1 fics i had previously written were for 2010s grid ships so obviously a smaller readership but i had not looked at the 3316 tag before posting mine so i had no idea what kind of numbers 3316 fics pull. 3316 readers have been very generous to me but perhaps should be more discerning. like i will write a good 3316 fic that has something meaningful to say i promise it will just take me some time…

most fun story to write:
honestly i had a pretty fun time writing everything this year! maybe see the static from a mile away was the most fun because it is the most evil. i also think it is the first time i have posted explicit het which feels like about time since i am such a staunch het rights activist. other than that well yes you’ll know it at once is up again because myshiprealtonins kind of the most powerful force in the universe.

hardest story to write:
probably two’s a crowd because i was writing it mostly on my phone while travelling and it kept getting longer like i thought it was only going to be 2-3k and then it ended up over 7k. i think anything over around the 5k mark is too unwieldy to manage on a phone because i write so unstructuredly/nonlinearly that it’s too much scrolling up and down to find the part that i want to work on or to move sections around. like i really struggled to conceptualise how much i had left because i couldn’t see the whole doc easily. also omg words just would not work for me like it really felt like i suddenly forgot how to string sentences together, everything was coming out looking like ai generated slop. it was genuinely shocking to me how bad my performance was like not even in the usual catastrophising i am an untalented hack who should retire way it was like, i know i can write better than this!! what’s going on!! but i think the thing that was going on was motion sickness from being on that damn phone on the mrt.

favourite opening lines:
from two’s a crowd:

The Tashkent Hyatt lobby is done up in glossy beige neutrals so shiny under the lights they could rival the championship trophy Oscar isn’t holding.

not a very strong showing from me this year in opening lines ngl, but when is it ever…

favourite closing lines:
from cruel with my intention:

Sebastian hums. “You will be up on the podium with me next year, yeah?” she says. She touches Nico’s cheek, the tip of Nico’s bare shoulder, Nico’s elbow. She leans in. Against Nico’s mouth: “But I’ll still be faster.”

Nico says, “You don’t even know how fast I could be.”

going through my ending lines over the year it’s looking like i’m obsessed with a vaguely ominous and dramatically ironic line of dialogue to close a fic. girl let’s try for some more variety in 2026 <3

favourite tag used:
tie between Schrodinger’s Rivalry and Background Canon-Typical 2010s Grid Sluttery. i love a silly jokes tag i do think i’m doing a pretty good job coming up with fun f1 tags.

goals for 2026:
i’d like to write something around the 20k mark again, i am thinking about doing a 3316 time loop au because i’ve always wanted to write a Someone Else’s Time Loop fic and also ever since i said max’s lotus eater dream is 1 million km long wheel to wheel battle with charles i have just really thought that… but anyway i would need to decide what race to loop and why so let me relax i will cook later. i definitely want to write a lot of 3316 in general <3 and i want to also write sewis/sebcedes because they are soooo important to me but i fear i might just be genuinely too fucked up about sewis to confront it in fic form, and also i don’t think i have anything to add to the impressive body of literature that is already out there. i would like to write brocedes but again i doubt i have anything useful or interesting to say. so it’s looking like i’m just gonna be 3316 sex merchant which is fine too. if anyone has any ideas for what kind of sex they could be having can you let me know please i’m out of ideas again.

i never got around to doing my 2024 wrap-up post so i didn’t have any goals for 2025 oops… well i didn’t finish dreampuri that’s probably about all anyone needs to know lmao.


CURRENT WIPS
divine; seamless | tennis rpf, jannik/carlos

The moments they drew close: only the walk towards the net at the end of a match, the momentary contact of a handshake or embrace, Carlos's face in his neck, Carlos's hand on his shoulder, the coin-face counterparts of victory and defeat flipping over and over in the air forever.

bro i fucked up my timing on this one so bad, it’s meant to be my usual #nothinghappens vague tension shipfic set circa cincy/uso but i took too long detouring through car yaoi and in the meantime sincaraz stopped having ambiguous distance and started being super effusively solicitous about each other on main so now i’m straight out of the meta. i am going to observe how they are acting in the korea exho and ao and recalibrate… i really do want to write for sincaraz i love them dearly just need to lock in.

no new friends | formula 1/tennis rpf, oscar/jannik

Jannik tilts his head. "Thank you," he says, slowly, the ghost of a question mark in his intonation. "It's not something I hear. From one person, maybe. My tennis, it is not so lovely.” He says it matter-of-factly, as unapologetic as the rest of him.

“But you love it?”

“Of course,” Jannik says. “It is my tennis, no?”

“Yeah,” Oscar says. “Yeah, I get that.”

i need to rework this so it’s set in abu dhabi 2025 but literally my narrative parallels ship<3 when you are pr trained orange themed rising star prodigies always fighting the machine/iceman/unemotional allegations and also have an older retired pro australian mentor figure<3 i think it’s so funny that oscar’s onepick is jannik and jannik’s onepick is charles. again a #nothinghappens fic and shouldn’t be too long i just need to like stop being distracted by 3316 long enough to think it through.

you must have been very far | formula 1 rpf, all/charles (max/charles endgame)

Lewis is not the first world champion teammate Charles has had, but Sebastian was never so far away. The difference, Charles knows, is that he has come to partner Lewis too late. He is neither teammate nor rival in any sense other than literal. The part of Lewis that he can reach is only a peripheral flash of a person Charles will never entirely see, already half-apotheosised into something greater than the dream they share. A man calcifying into artwork, a cordoned-off room in a red museum.

been calling this one cursefic in my mind, basically i’m plagiarising my qcyn2 fic about kxe being cursed and trying to break the curse with true love’s kiss which she has to goldilocks test her way through her fellow contestants to figure out. it’s that but for charles so i can feel like i too am contributing to the development of this year’s car while making him kiss a bunch of his coworkers. this is my main priority wip rn, i would like to get it done before the start of the season but if i think of more sex that 3316 could be having i might get sidetracked by that who could say.

getting off the subject | sakamoto days, nagumo/osaragi(/shishiba)

She moves directly towards him as if she’s excising the space in front of her rather than walking. Without so much as a hello she crawls onto his lap, heedless of the way her skirts crumple between their bodies. She’s warm but not febrile, a cocked-hammer tension of purpose. The scent of iron clings to her skin like a signature perfume. She’s definitely going to get the blood splatter of whichever miserable sucker recently found themselves on the business end of her circular saw all over his nice leather upholstery. He definitely should have hung out at an Order safehouse today.

very silly post-assassination adrenalin rush coworkers with benefits naguosa sex where both of them clearly like shishiba more than each other. i don’t know if i like sakadays enough to make the effort of finishing this although it is fairly progressed so it sure would be a shame if it all went to waste…

hold me down for one night | nct dream, jaemin/renjun

They do this dance every time; Renjun could recite the dialogue himself. The usual magnanimity masquerade from Jaemin, or less generously an abdication of responsibility. “You're the champion,” Renjun says. He could still smash the bottle in his hands, just for the sake of making something happen. The glass, the foam, the shatter of adrenaline. “It's your decision.”

Apparently in no hurry to get started, Jaemin sits down on the edge of the bed and says, “You drove well today.”

ostensibly jmrn f1 au winner’s room fic except all i’ve managed to make them do is discuss team lineups so it’s really just room. this is my other main priority wip though, i definitely should have finished this in 2025 to keep my streak of posting dream fic every year since 2018 </3 but i will do my best to resurrect the streak in 2026.


BONUS ROUND: SUPERLATIVES
  • ship of the year: max verstappen/charles leclerc
    • m/m of the year: other than 3316, jannik sinner/carlos alcaraz
    • m/f of the year: nagumo/osaragi (with shishiba/osaragi premise)
    • f/f of the year: elena rybakina/emma raducanu
    • polyshipping of the year: lewis hamilton/sebastian vettel/nico rosberg
  • 1 of the year: max verstappen
  • 0 of the year: sebastian vettel (sorry charles 2026 will be your year)
  • oshi of the year: charles leclerc
  • song of the year: reprogram - kilo kish (2025 release) / 3 strikes - terror jr (first listen in 2025)
  • album of the year: purity ring - purity ring. but addison - addison rae was veryyyyyy close.
  • movie/tv/anime of the year: medalist…? i guess. i mean i liked it but its only competition was like, the f1 movie. i don’t watch anything.
  • book of the year: changeover - giri nathan
  • game of the year: can i be honest it is the otter's treasure minigame in the aliexpress app. since i didn't start playing king's lynn farm until 2026.
  • concert of the year: tds4 in seoul
  • sports event of the year: mclaren double dsq jannik sinner and elena rybakina atp & wta finals champions
  • run of the year: hoka half marathon
  • perfume of the year: criollo - voyager
  • treat of the year: hojicha kakigori from kaiji
  • word of the year: vivid

dreamseller: (Default)
😺🎣 ([personal profile] dreamseller) wrote2026-01-03 02:36 am
Entry tags:

kpop '25

and normal music toognarly was good )
fwcu: (namesake)
fwcu ([personal profile] fwcu) wrote2026-01-02 04:54 pm
Entry tags:

WEIRD YEAR

Hi guys. So like, ten million years ago I made a post about making out with a girl at a party. We called her N, and she is an arab baddie who is a great time at parties and still does want to drunk makeout with me. Occluded in that post, was that when ex-oomr, who will we call S, tapped on my back and N's back to get us to makeout, we were sitting across from H and having a normal/funny 3way conversation. H, similar to N, is an arab baddie and they both have Eyebrows™️ and big buggy eyes that are made smaller by the lens of her glasses, and they're both quite fair. Anyway, so guess who won.

Read more... )